Four Kinds of Fresa
CHILANGOLANDIA 🇲🇽🤘LIST-ACLE📜
8/28/20222 min read
Obviously, they come in all shapes and sizes, but let's have fun guys. It's a blog, not a New York Times article.
1) The Entrepreneur
Ósea, baby, come on. Like we said, Papi's business is their business. The Entrepreneur gets off on wearing business attire to dinner and bragging about their stocks. Wait. No. Bitcoin. Obviously. And they will definitely rant about why you have to invest.
Side note: It makes me snort at this point, because you have to be delusional if you think I would even consider doing that. And it's not necessarily because I don't believe what they say or because I don't think Bitcoin is real. It's more because I have the mentality of a senile old man. I don't even trust ATM machines. Let alone some magical, invisible currency that flip flops every day and has 20 different versions of itself. Like Dogecoin? Can we first fix global warming, before you start telling me that there are computer farms making money out there, and that they too worsen the effects of climate change?
Okay, so maybe I'm getting a little carried away. Back to making fun of Mexico City's elite juniors (probably, including me hehe).
2) The Influencer
And I don't just mean the person who occasionally posts a TikTok dance. I mean the person who truly, and firmly believes that, they are a lifestyle. Some of them may have sponsorships, others pretend they do. Regardless, they are the moment. Please cue that TikTok sound. You know the one I'm talking about. Or look it up ya youngin'. Extra points if they tag brands on their posts so you know exactly where they got the basic white tee. Silly little thangs.
3) The Vegan
Probably also an influencer. And to be completely honest, I just don't get them. Like, I love that you're doing something to help stop climate change, but also, could you maybe not diss my choices? Yes, it's great and I definitely agree that my tacos al pastor are not sustainable. But you know what else isn't sustainable? Literally everything. Being eco friendly is starting to feel like an impossible task, especially when 20 companies have contributed to 480bn tonnes of carbon dioxide equivalent since 1965. Brb. I'm going to cry at El Charco (a taco place obviously).
4) The Hipster
Ah finally. Probably the most benevolent of the Fresa kind. They really just want to hang out at some cute cafe, smoke a little doobie and talk about music. We can make fun of them all we want, but really, I'm completely down for it. Yes I'll go to see that band I've probably never heard of. Whatever. C'est la vie.
As always, it's been a pleasure ranting with you people.
All the vibes,
Not Your Therapist
